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Friday, May 24, 2013

Coming Out of the Fog

I just realized it has been exactly 2 months since I last posted. Wow, I can't believe how much has changed in just 2 short months. On April 3, we had baby #2. Finally, 7 weeks later I feel like I'm starting to walk out of the newborn "fog".

At the risk of offending many of you that probably love the newborn stage, it is not my favorite. Sleep deprivation, constant feedings and endless crying are just not my idea of a good time. :) But, now that we have a good schedule going and he's sleeping so much better; I can look back and see what God has been trying to teach me through my last baby, things I don't think I learned with my first.

1. Self-denial:

I know this is something I should have learned with my first but I think I ignored the lesson. With one child, you can still figure out how to make things about yourself and still make time for you. That becomes increasingly difficult with each child you have. There is no longer much time in the day for mommy and that's okay. I'm constantly reminded that these early years are short and will soon be over. Right now my job is to (mostly) deny self and take care of my husband and little ones.

The Christian walk is all about self-denial. Jesus said in Luke 9:23, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." Not only am I called to self-denial as a mom but in order to follow Jesus; I have to give up myself daily. This isn't just a calling for moms; it's for all Christians. If I want to follow Jesus, I have to give up my selfish desires, my needs, my pride and seek what Jesus desires and follow the path he's laid out for me.

2. Pray without ceasing:

As a mom of two small children, the times where I can actually sit down with a cup of coffee, my Bible, my journal and my undivided thoughts are few and far between. Thankfully with new technology, I always have scriptures at my finger tips and can feed on God's Word in small increments throughout the day, but hours of endless study of the Word is currently not within my grasp. But, I can pray. 6-8 times a day/night I get to spend 20 minutes or so feeding my son and that time forces me to be quiet and stationary. I could spend the time surfing the web on my phone (which I find myself doing all too often) or I can approach God's throne and intercede on behalf of my family and friends.

I miss the days where I can have hours to myself to study and read and meditate. I remember thinking that my walk is totally going to suffer because I no longer have that precious time. But, God has shown me that being a mom doesn't mean my walk with Him has to suffer. He gives me time if I would only use it wisely.

Jeremiah 29:13-14 are verses that God has led me to focus on this summer.

"You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile."

God knows where I am and what's on my plate. He also knows my heart and wants all of it. He wants me to seek Him with all of my heart, even at 2:30 in the morning in a rocking chair. If I seek Him in those moments, I will find Him.

3. I am not sufficient:

But, He is!

"Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God..." 2 Corinthians 3:5